How you and your child can learn from your history

Our daughter keeps asking to see photos of me as a baby.  She’s fascinated!  I keep meaning to dig them out at my parents.  (Yes, they actually have them stuck into photo albums, not saved and hidden from view on a hard drive and in ‘clouds’…)

There’s one particular photo of our daughter when she was around 6 months old in her bouncer.  She’s the complete and utter, absolute double of me as a baby in this photo (except her eye colour and tone, which are 100% hubby’s – the shape of the eyes and the gaze are absolutely me though…)

I love looking back at photos.  It’s fascinating that my baby face started out so soft and unweathered!  I wonder now what the first real stress was that I experienced and what effect that had on my features.  And then as to how much more stress and lack of sleep over the years contributed to my ‘now’ face!  (No, I’m not doing before and after pics!)

But it’s life, isn’t it?  It’s what makes us, us.

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How we deal with life and stress, of course, can determine how rugged and weathered we look years down the line.  Some of it’s genetics but if I knew growing up what I know now about life, about healthy living, about the effects of ‘what goes in, comes out’ (so to speak!), I would very likely have had a different approach, have been kinder to my younger self!  Maybe even have taken things more slowly…

I certainly deal with stress in a different way now.

I’m not even sure how I dealt with such things as exams, boys, student life and budgeting.

But nowadays, I choose to relax with candles, yoga, meditation and reiki, and I also eat lots of fruit and veg.

My older, wiser self would, no doubt, be critical of my much younger self.

And as our daughter grows up, I know she takes it all in because she’s asked to do yoga with me.  She asks which crystals are which.  She notices things.  She copies my healthy eating.  She copies my attitude to others and adopts my kinder, more patient qualities (hark at me!)

Being a parent is my chance to re-write history, to open doors for our daughter, to open her mind to possibilities that my younger self knew existed.

I’m using my knowledge and turning my story, my history into her-story

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What would you do differently in turning your story into your child’s future history?  I’d love to know!  Please comment below or tweet me @AllSortsHere

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9 comments to “How you and your child can learn from your history”
  1. My body has changed over the years, and there are stories written upon it, stories of growing babies and birthing, stories of smoking, stories of rebelliousness and sadness. What am I teaching my children through these stories? Hopefully that life is to be lived, and there is good in everything, that we can focus on that instead of trying to fit our star shaped selves into the narrow boxes that seem to be required by society. I’ve got some old family photos too, the kids just take them as read, but I particularly love the photo of my Great Great Aunt Mamie, wearing her Russian clothes and looking bloody fabulous.

  2. I’ve often wondered if I would take a different course if I had known then what I know now. An interesting intellectual exercise.

  3. I strive consciously to give an example to my daughter about food, as I know I learned disordered eating watching my mother and I don’t want history to repeat itself. I find it very hard. It sounds like you’re instilling wonderful habits- well done!

  4. I try and make sure that Grace has it in her to stand up for herself and makes sure she doesn’t get walked on. I feel I don’t set a great example for her at the moment (very hormonal) but I think she understands! You sound like you have a great relationship with your daughter #ThePrompt

  5. Hindsight is a wonderful thing, and life has taught me many lessons along the way! I try my best to model kindness and tolerance, and when I fail, I apologise and explain. We’re all learning all the time, and I think it’s really important that our kids understand that. It sounds like you have a wonderful relationship with your daughter. Thank you so much for sharing with #ThePrompt x

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